It's amazing how quickly time goes! Ella is two weeks old today! I have to admit, we're all three exhausted still. Adjusting to a new baby is a lot of hard work! I'm sure the adjustment for her has been hard, too.
Breastfeeding is going ok. I think it will take us a while longer to really get the hang of it. I can completely understand why people give it up--I think that breastfeeding has been the hardest part of our journey together thus far. I keep thinking about how much easier life would be if we gave her a bottle, but then I remind myself of all the benefits we're both getting by breastfeeding. Although it's the hardest thing I've ever done, I know it will be worth it in the end.
Speaking of feeding, Ella is gaining weight! She lost 9% of her birth weight while we were in the hospital. They told us that at 10% they start to really worry, so we had to take her to the dr.s the next day. Last Wednesday, she weighed 6 pounds, 11 ounces (which was better than in the hospital), and this past Wednesday (the 25th) we took her in for another weight check and she weighed 7 pounds, 3.5 ounces!! We were so excited :) It means that our little bean is growing! And all of the millions (it feels like) of feedings are actually filling her :)
We have some newer pictures, but the camera is downstairs (of course) and I'm typing all of this one-handed while she sleeps in my arms (she rarely sleeps anywhere else yet...). So the pictures will have to wait. But, I just wanted to give a little update since we haven't written since we've been home.
It's taking us a while to adjust, and we're very tired, but all is well. We're taking life one day at a time and loving every minute with our little Ella :)
About Me
- Rachel
- Married on March 19, 2005 :) Our pride and joy is our little Ella--born on June 13, 2008! We are Christian, cloth-diapering, co-sleeping, non-spanking, snuggly, attatched parents! If you have any questions about who we are or why we parent the way we do, we'd be happy to tell you!
2 comments:
So very happy to hear how well things are going! :-)
And the baby's gaining weight. Even better! Everything is working according to plan. :-D
Thanks for the news.
Congratulations!!! Your comment about breastfeeding being hard struck a chord with me, because I remember that very well, even though it was 13 years ago. When something resonates with me, I get passionate, and when I get passionate I use a lot of words. I hope it doesn't overwhelm you (one piece of advice about advice--take it with a grain of salt, and that includes everything that is to follow here :) I hope it encourages you, but if it's too much or too advice-y, just let it go in one ear and out the other!)
"I can completely understand why people give it up..." Me too :) At least the first time around. I had four babies, and figuring out the nursing thing was for sure hardest for baby #1 and I.
Looking back, I wish they (people, nurses, books, LaLeche league) had been a bit more honest about exactly HOW hard it could be instead of just trying to do a sell job to convince me to do it. If I'd have known it sometimes could be that hard to get figured out and work well I probably could have been less stressed, thinking I must have been doing something wrong, since it was supposed to be this easy, natural as anything experience. That kind of stress (being upset with myself because I was having such a hard time) certainly didn't help make it any easier!
Second, you give a clue to another encouragement when you say, "I know it will be worth it in the end." The thing that it is hard to actually feel, especially with the first baby, is that it WILL end (and yes, it will be worth it in the end, but you already know that. It's the remembering that the tough stuff HAS an actual end that is hard.) That mental shift that came from baby 1 actually ending nursing at some point did make it so much easier the next three times to relax and ride the waves of exhaustion and crying (the baby's, though of course, sometimes my own, too!), because I experientially knew the crying and pain (and there was much less of that the following times) really didn't last forever.
Third, sometimes it helps to just admit that I felt grumpy because I wasn't getting enough sleep and because nursing was hard. I had friends that loved waking up in the middle of the night, even when their babies didn't, and looking at them. I'm never quite in the mood for any kind of adoration, not even baby adoration, in the middle of the night--in the middle of many sleep deprived nights. At some point along the way I realized that didn't make me a bad Mom and it didn't mean I didn't adore and love my baby just because I felt grumpy when he was demanding to be fed again. I loved him, so I fed him. That did trump the grumpy (meaning grumpy doesn't equal I don't love you. Grumpy just meant I didn't get enough sleep, but I love you and I'm going to take care of you still, even while I'm grumpy. That's good, loving Mom stuff there).
Fourth, if you can find anyway to spoil yourself while you nurse, by all means do it. It's even nicer if there is someone else around to spoil you when you nurse (my mother-in-law was really big on doing that when she visited. Overkill nice, and it really did make a difference. She flooded me with drinks and treats and books and the fan on and my feet propped up.) The thing is, relaxing really is one of the most helpful things for making breastfeeding successful at each little meal. You've already got a few strikes against you in the relaxing department when you know ahead of time it's going to hurt or baby's not going to be very cooperative or even awake or is going to get mad because the milk doesn't let down quick enough or choke because it lets down so fast, etc. etc. etc. You're not going to be able to relax because it's easy or comfortable (at least not at first--that will come one day, I can almost guarantee). So, for now, happy distractions might help compensate to help you relax a little bit anyway. Books you don't usually get time to read, music that relaxes you, some special comfort food treat just for that time--little indulgences that give you something to look forward to that can counter the normal tension when you're faced with trying to do something that is difficult and stressful and demanding and IMPORTANT (something hard wouldn't be so discouraging if you didn't also feel so much pressure to get it right because it matters so stinking much...) Even if baby is screaming like she's going to starve if you don't feed her now, I think it helps to take that extra minute to get yourself settled comfortably with some pleasant distractions to help you relax even though it's tough.
And finally, don't feel bad about asking for help. I can't remember how long someone had told me nursing might hurt, but I do remember I was way past the limit and it still was hurting. Somebody told me that La Leche League offered free consultations. Sometimes helpful people can make me feel more guilty than they help, but by that point and time, I didn't care. I just wanted help. And the lady that came was really helpful. But, also, it helped to talk to other Moms who told me it was okay, what I was going through was normal, it wouldn't last forever etc. Don't feel bad calling somebody (even if it's a different somebody) every time you feel like you can't make it. That's how we're supposed to help each other in the Body of Christ--cheering on the faithful, encouraging the weary, letting our own lives and what we've made it through encourage each other. By seeking that kind of encouragement, you give others the gift of letting what they've made it through have further purpose. It's okay if you hear it once that your baby is fine because she's gaining weight and peeing enough, and then doubt it again a couple of hours later and need to hear again that things are okay and she is getting enough milk, etc. If you wonder, and if it encourages you to wonder out loud to other people, feel free to do that.
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